|
Date : Thursday, July 31, 2008
Time : 11:24 PM Title : George. George spoke to me (again) tonight and I realized I still need people to steer me back.
Date : Monday, July 28, 2008
Time : 3:09 PM Title : =( One of the external vendors' employee, John, just got sacked. Though it didn't come as a surprise to us 'cos it was more or less expected; I still felt sad. I didn't know him very well, had 1 meal with him before, but he always came around looking for my colleague.
He will, definitely, find somewhere else, where someone else will appreciate him for who he is and what he does.
Date : Sunday, July 27, 2008
Time : 11:50 PM Title : 给我的信 玮玲， 我不能过去你那里，所以这样发mail吧。 我真的觉得你回去会很受伤，会大哭，比在这里还难受，所以如果在这里可以调整好，就不要回了。 但是，有些情绪真的是压不住的，我很了解你现在的心情，换到是我，我会飞回去的，明明知道前面是火海，但是我选择往下跳，只是允许自己最后一次放纵，给自己一个彻底死心的理由。 与其这样每天平摊痛苦，不如与痛苦来一个彻底的决裂，回来后面对新的人生。 可是，这样做的前提是，你一定要保证回来后可以忘记以前的所有东西，重新开始，不可以再藕断丝连，不肯放手，也不可以任性子这样放纵自己了。 可以做到吗玮玲？ 如果可以的话，我是同意你回去的。
Date : Saturday, July 26, 2008
Time : 10:23 AM Title : September 2006..  I miss these 2 girls so much..
Date : Thursday, July 24, 2008
Time : 4:13 PM Title : I am not like you and I will not be like you Yes, I am disappointed, still very disappointed with him. How can he feel something for her when we were still together? Yes, I did met someone too, but I stopped myself, stopped myself from developing any unnecessary feelings for him because I knew it wasn't right. It was not being respectful to him. A committed relationship comprises of understanding. I admit that I was attracted to him but I stopped myself.
Date :
Time : 9:07 AM Title : *hugs wei ling::things will still be the same for you and me right?
jAded dapHne:: aiyo my dear.. jAded dapHne:: B is not me jAded dapHne:: I am not B jAded dapHne:: i am xSg jAded dapHne:: one and only!
Date : Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Time : 8:20 PM Title : What's next? I started thinking what love is. How do you know whether you are in love with that someone?
Yes, there is of course the fluttering butterflies in the stomach kinda feeling each time I think of him; I will blush when people start to tease the both of us..but does it mean I feel something for him? Last night, I started wondering why he didn't contact me. I went to bed before eleven, thinking that he might give me a call later and wake me up. I woke up in the middle of the night and checked my phone. There were no messages or missed calls from him. I started to wonder why. This morning he skyped me: Morning, silly ling.. Morning.. Morning..busy? Okay.. Yesterday I went drinking with my friends..drank a little too much.. Oh.. So, that explained everything. The lack of communication last night. ****** My mum called me and I teared again. Couldn't remember why I did so. She has been calling me daily since last Saturday. I went to my first public bathing house in my life, right here in China. Naked women just walked up and down, as if it was very normal to go without clothes. They bathed, showered, prep-ed themselves. I sat in the sauna for at least 2 hours. It felt really good. There were many activities to be done, gyming, watching some live performances, massages, watching tv (with personal screen and a very comfy couch to sit in). The entire building is self-equipped. There is a club at the first level, ktv at the 2nd level, and even..rooms for guys to call for extra services..it's actually legalized here i assumed..In short, now I understand why people can just spend the entire day there without getting bored. Reached home late, but not without receiving his sms. He called me shortly after, and we talked for a while. I know what it will be how it will turn out to be if this continues on; but I don't know whether I should continue with it. Yes, I know life's short, we shouldn't worry so much..and I do feel comfortable with him.. And this morning, I woke up..but the first person that came to my mind was you. On a random note, my roomie has been telling me that her bf's sister is pregnant. Her office's colleague is pregnant. Her office's colleague's wife is pregnant. Now, even her sister is pregnant... My favourite swimmer, Ian Thrope, won't be taking part in this year's Olympics.. I caught the movie 21 some nights ago at my colleague's place, rather randomly too. The show's not bad. The entire day I was trying not to eat too much..but you can't really go without chips and coke while watching a show eh? The 2 of us finished 2 packets of chips and drank lots of coke. Well, at least it felt good to snack. We caught a couple of episodes of FRIENDS..He bought the entire series..season 1 to 10 I think..for just a little over 200RMB..and am looking to more chips and ice cream and movie-watching for the next couple of months!
Date : Sunday, July 20, 2008
Time : 4:57 PM Title : =) "They know what I'm doing is good for them. You, you're not satisfied knowing that it's good, you want more. You want more of me. You know what you want."
Date : Friday, July 18, 2008
Time : 11:39 PM Title : =) wei ling, you don't like to go out with me?
i feel scared.. why? lots of reasons.. I don't want to be with anyone now.. I don't want to make you unhappy.. I don't want to hurt you.. hurt me? how come? don't know..i want you to be happy too.. but i'm happy now.. okay i understand what you are trying to say.. what do you understand? what you do now is good for me.. i like it when everyone hangs out together.. i feel scared when it's only the two of us.. i'm not ready yet.. but i am very happy to have you around.. these few days cos you make me smile.. really.. oh..it's my pleasure.. but i don't want you to be a replacement..you understand? i want you to know that whenever, there will always be a silly guy who will be here for you.. if i want to love you, i want to love you because you are you, and not because you are right here now and replacing him.. i want you to know that you are not alone.. that's why i said it'll be unfair.. maybe we can take it slow.. i understand you..silly ling.. hee.. eh..raining very heavily now.. the purpose of what i did and do, doesn't mean that i want you to accept me..i also don't know why..but i just wanna be there for you..from my heart.. okay =) maybe we can be good friends for now..right? haha.. yup of course.. i cannot believe myself that i am saying all these to you.. why? i am affected by you..don't know why too..tell me..... yah it's like raining..very comfortable to sleep..haha.. raining?? yup nice weather to sleep.. haha.. 风雨过后有彩虹！
Date :
Time : 4:21 PM Title : To me. Caught Red Cliff last night. My first time watching a movie here. It was not bad, engaging.
Cleaned my workdesk a little yesterday. At least it's not as messy as before. Hee. I'm beginning to gain back my momentum at work. Finally called my mum. Should stop being too honest with everyone, anyone. Should learn to be more discreet. My past seems to be moving on too slow, while my future is coming by way too fast for me to grab hold of. Even faster than before. Should stop mourning - been wearing all black since july 4th till now. Don't know what I want, but I know what my choices are. Knocking off soon!
Date : Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Time : 1:36 PM Title : It happened.. Last night, what I was looking for all this while, what has been lacking all this while, happened. A little late (and not really the best time to do so) and not really the one which I wished it would be. I have been trying to avoid it, to hide from it, to stop it from happening.
Isn't it all supposed to be about compromising? Perhaps not. I gave up what I wanted - but to realise that it wasn't going to work out. No one knows what the future holds for us, and with that, I will leave everything to you, for now. =)
Date : Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Time : 4:55 PM Title : =) i still think i am your future bf haha that's interesting no, not bf, husband! -_-"" we shall see.. Of course, this is not the time to talk about all these..
Date : Friday, July 11, 2008
Time : 8:07 AM Title : The End of a Beginning Someone once said that if my life can be documented, it will be written in the form of a very thick book. And with the many chapters a book has, this is probably one of the closest to the heart chapters of my life: I'm sorry for hurting you in any way which I have done so.
Date : Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Time : 8:44 AM Title : Morning.. There are reasons to stay, and there are reasons to leave. I don't know what I want, but I do know what I don't want.
I know I will be okay.. but I don't want it to like that.. I don't want to be like them.. There are too many "what-if"s..too many..how I wish I can have a control over what I want.. I don't want to get used to it. Why should I?
Date : Sunday, July 06, 2008
Time : 10:01 PM Title : The first Sunday.. I haven't been drinking much since I came back after CNY. Missing were the days the group of us would go drinking every Saturday after work..it seemed like each had his/her own agenda to attend to..Stepping into Face last night was refreshing. Just us, the normal few. We didn't even remember where the entrance was. Yes, the crowd wasn't fantastic, music's average, drinks were normal and nothing spectacular; but all I could remember was that I felt happy, even if it was for that short while there. Oh, not to forget I laughed real hard on Saturday morning with my roomie while rushing down to the van 'cos we were so so late and everyone else was waiting for us in the van to go to work. My watch was slow so I thought it was still 0720 but it was actually 0740.. -_-"" It just felt so silly.. George wanted to talk to me today, on a Sunday..But I no longer feel as worried as the previous times when he wanted to do so..it was a good talk nonetheless..we spoke about what we want in life, his experiences in dating and working.. It's the first sunday..and everything more or less felt the same..except of course with a little of difference..actually the fact was that everything feels so different..I would need some time to get used to..the entire week went by in a blur..I often found myself daydreaming or very distracted..am now trying to find some stability..and I.......will be back soon.. And happy birthday to you.
Date : Saturday, July 05, 2008
Time : 3:01 PM Title : Just be there.. We laughed so much, then we cried all night And you left your shoes in the tree, with me I'll wear them to your house, tonight Magic in the air, tonight Just be there for me right now right here, and everything will be all so right some day.
Date : Friday, July 04, 2008
Time : 2:35 PM Title : I wanna go home.. Yesterday my roomie talked to me. She made me see sense in many issues. People do change..and I don't want to change into someone whom I don't want to be; whom I don't recognise at all.
At this moment, all I want to do is to be back home, be back in Singapore, and never to come back here anymore. |
January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 Angela Benson Chun Meng Daphne xsg Fanny Felix FF Gillian Jason Joanna Nadiah Nicholas Peijuan Peijie Peiyu Rui Ting Shufen Simin Sweet Ling Wei Biao Xiuqin Yanni Yi Ting Designed by { ★CRUSHthespeaker } Thankful to { blogskins l xox } Blogged to { 53-percent } |
