Date : Monday, August 04, 2008
Time : 9:38 PM
Title : So far..

Never a day has passed which I am faced without having to get out of my comfort zone, at work especially. You know how you can recognize that you are out of your comfort zone when you do feel uncomfortable with what you are facing at that moment (okay this sounds crap), but I am trying to explain how hard it is to be standing right there, out of my comfort zone, when the easiest thing I can do is to duck under my comforts, hide in my room and sleep the time away. Or even fly back to home sweet home. And not only am I standing there, I try to make it my comfort zone.

And it gets me thinking whether the next time I feel uncomfortable, is it because it is harder than the previous one (you know like a steeper challenge of the similar type of fear); or it might just be another type of fear which I am having. Or it might even be the same type of challenge which I have gone through or even a weaker one. If it's a weaker one, does it mean that I didn't really learn from the previous experience?

Do you get what I mean?

And I really like what I am experiencing at work everyday, even though when I am experiencing it, I totally dislike it, hate it and want to stop doing it. But sometimes, at the end of the day, I think through what I have done for the day and am satisfied with what I have done. You know for example, one challenge was to bring a contract to the chairman of the company to let him sign. And well, how often do you get to meet the chairman of the company? I don't. I still can vividly remember the entire scene in his office. And not before having George to remind me to prep myself well so that I won't sprout nonsense or stammer when the chairman asks me questions. George said: "You must know what you are saying." That got me a little terrified. But in the end, everything was a breeze..But it took me a lot of courage to knock on his door and to show him the contract. I remember myself standing outside his office for 5 minutes to compose myself and to think of my lines.

There are many things I have learnt as well, such as to attend meetings representing George, to be responsible for my words and actions, to organize and plan my tasks well (which means to multi-task), to have my own project and watch it grow and develop in the way which is best for the company, to not do unto others what others do to me (to rise about others), to not be swayed so easily (this I am still working hard at it), not to be affected by others (and this is important cos there will always be office politics and rumours), to be proud and satisfied with my results cos it is not always good to expect too much, and most importantly, to grow as an individual and to make sure that I am growing in the way I want and hope to be.

There are always many great theories and oh man, yes, I am always bogged down with all these cos of all the more experienced people around me (and some can speak really well and am so convincing) and of course this will mean the uncles especially. Maybe 'cos I am still a fresh grad, with only less than a year of experience. It is never too wrong to listen to others, but to absorb what I believe in, what I think is true and to of course sieve out the rest.

Being so far away from my loved ones is not easy too. Not easy for me, not easy for them too. Mummy told me something which kinda made me cried last night, she said knowing that I have chosen to go abroad and work, as a family member, she will not ask me to stay 'cos it's my choice and it might be good for me. And as a mother, she will give me her full support and will always be there for me and love me.

If I am given a chance to choose whether I will want to work here, well, minus some hiccups along the way, I rather choose a job which is challenging, makes me grow and not be so dependent, and gets me out of my comfort zone. =)

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Name: Wei Ling

Location: King's, Singapore

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